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Category Archives: Financial Advice

Some ideas about how to keep more of your hard-earned money

Serial Employee

12 Saturday Jan 2019

Posted by dunkablog in Financial Advice, Writing

≈ 1 Comment

Picture of the Stud in its heyday
I got laid off because I was underage

It wasn’t until I wrote the fourth book (A Quarter) that I at last had one of those “know thyself” moments. I have been laid off or fired from nearly two dozen jobs. I’m smart, very good at solving problems…but I don’t fit in with corporate culture. I don’t even fit in with anti-establishment culture. Here is an incomplete inventory of the jobs where I had to quit or was let go for incompetence, under-agedness, or spite:

  • Vallejo Times Herald – Paper boy
  • William Morris Reproductions – Wallpaper sample pack creator
  • Union Hotel – Busboy
  • Varsity Theater – Ticket vendor
  • Second Coming Records – Store clerk
  • Patricia Field – Shop girl
  • Milk Bar – Janitor and Barback
  • Diggery Inn – Dishwasher
  • Stud Bar Barback
  • Sparky’s – Prep cook
  • Grubstake – Dishwasher
  • International Center -Towel boy
  • Marcello’s Pizza – cashier
  • Broadmoor Hotel – Slave/Waiter
  • Peachy’s Puffs – Cigarette boy
  • New Line Cinema – 3rd Production Accountant
  • Tupperware Lady
  • Sixteen to Life – Assistant to Executive Producer
  • Married to the Kellys – Assistant to Line Producer
  • New Line Cinema – Product placement assistant
  • Ascent Media – Project manager
  • Miller Group – Advertising account manager
  • Deluxe Media – Billing process manager

A few jobs in my life were a decent match. They ended for reasons like a major geographical move, or widespread layoffs:

  • Marriott’s Great America – Self-reflexive juice salesman
  • Tower Records – Store clerk
  • TimeShare Consultants – Phone sex bookkeeper filer and dog walker
  • Italian Welfare Agency – Social worker
  • Italian Cultural Institute – Event promoter, News segment producer and Radio DJ
  • Lavender Lounge – Segment producer
  • New Line Cinema -Post production accountant
  • Verestar – Global account manager
  • The Acres – Musician
  • La Lucha – Producer/Director/Writer/Editor
  • Deluxe Media – Manager – Overseas Back Office
  • Psychotic Break Series – Author

The primary pattern: I need to express myself and feel good about the work I’m doing. I need to be in a group of similarly creative and quirky outcasts. I have waxing and waning periods of creativity and energy, so I need to have a job that lets me make my own hours or is only intermittent work. Travel and languages keep me interested for a while, too. Tower Records was a really great group of people. I loved working there. Second Coming Records was hell in a glass box. I write about them in the prequel. Several people who worked there have been diagnosed with PTSD. So, if I’m going to work for the man, the boss better be cool.

The boss on this one was super cool…me!

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Finance in the Shadows and 5150

22 Friday Apr 2016

Posted by dunkablog in Creativity, Financial Advice

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

mental illness

I began a series of posts on LinkedIn aimed at assisting some of society’s most vulnerable members who are struggling in the Shadow Economy.  You can read those articles here:

Finance in the Shadows on LinkedIn

I also wrote a book about mental illness that is intended to help families and loved ones of the mentally ill understand better what is happening inside the mind of their beloved.  I am uniquely qualified to write the book, and I will say no more.

Duncan’s Author Page

May this information reach eyes that need to read it, touch hearts that need to feel it, and open minds that are confused or closed.  I can’t fix the world, but I can do my little part to make it a better place, right?

5150_cover_09_Page_10

 

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Ten quick fixes for a home appraisal for about sixty dollars

26 Sunday Apr 2015

Posted by dunkablog in Financial Advice

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

appraisal, real estate, ROI

Our house appraised recently for a sum that was less than we had hoped.  Before having a second appraisal, we did the following ten things to improve the overall appearance of the house.  No appraiser will agree with me, but the proof is in the pudding – our second appraisal came in 20,000.00 higher than the previous one.   Here are ten quick things you can do to improve your house before an appraisal:
1. Clear the cobwebs – Get out your telescoping duster or a long handled broom and remove all cobwebs, inside and out. Cost – $0.00
2. Mow and edge your lawn.  We paid a guy to do this for $40.00 and it was worth every penny.
3. Use the magic eraser to get rid of smudge marks.  Mr. Clean has a product called the Magic Eraser – when damp, you can use it to remove smudge marks from doors, light switches, and other high-traffic areas that tend to get smudged.  Cost $3.99.
4. Sweep all outdoor and indoor surfaces.  If you have a cement patio, or other outdoor floor, treat it as you would the inside, and sweep it until you can eat off of it. Cost $0.00
5. Plant some annuals at the front entrance way – we didn’t even have time to plant, so we just bought some $1.88 six-packs of marigolds and placed them strategically near the front door.  It looked very impressive.  Cost $5.64
6. Bake some chocolate chip cookies – this is an old realtor trick.  Don’t cook cabbage or bacon – make some cookies and your home will smell like a home.  Cost $2.99 with a loyalty card at local supermarket.
7. Remove hard water stains with vinegar – if you have glass shower doors, put in some elbow grease with a brush and white vinegar.  It costs 99 cents at the 99 cent store, but the increase in home value is considerably more.  $0.99
8. Clean your stove top.  Cost $0.00 if you already have any type of all-purpose cleaner.
9. Weed your garden. This was included in the $40.00 above, but it can be free if you have time and a good back.
10. Put fresh flowers in vases.  Fresh flowers cost about $6.99 per bouquet at the grocery store.  We bought one and split it between several vases.  Cost $6.99

Total cost: $60.60 – only about 20 dollars if you mow and edge yourself.

ROI: 19,939.40 or about 33,000%

7e92f7de86cd3a8c6bdc8388a35406ac

Fresh flowers in vases make a house look homey

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I won 16.5 Million Dollars from the USGAO

20 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by dunkablog in Business, Financial Advice

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

facetious, funny, Nigerian letter, scam

i could not get them my Swift number and Socisl security etc fast enough! I can really use the money right now. Easy Street, here I come. 

It is amazing 

Visit http://www.dunkablog.com 


On Mar 19, 2015, at 3:10 PM, Credit Union (USA) <teste@yama.com.br> wrote:

Attn: Fund Beneficiary,
 
This letter will definitely be amazing to you because of its realistic value. Sorry for the delay and inconveniences that was rendered to you in your line of Inheritance Payment transaction with some African Banks/Officials a while ago. This is to let you know that we received a credit instruction from the United States Government Accountability Office (GAO) to credit your bank account with your pending contract/inheritance fund payment in the tune of US$18.5million from the Federal Government reserve account with our bank, California Credit Union. However, what we require from you in order to commence the necessary formalities for onward release of payment to you is a re-confirmation of your information/bank account details where you want your fund to be transferred.
 
{1}. Your full name and address===========================
{2}. Your telephone, and fax==============================
{3). Bank name and address================================
{4). Name on Acct — and Acct numbers========================
(5). Swift code / routing number===============================
(6). Your current occupation===================================
(7). Scan Copy of Drivers License or Working ID=======================
 
Be informed that transfer arrangement of your fund will commence immediately we hear from you. Note, the California Credit Union will not hesitates to release your payment within 72hours in accordance with fund release order regulations.. Note that we have to obtain Letter Of Authorization from the United States Attorney General before your fund is transferred into your account. For more details on how this Letter Of Authorization can be obtained contact me direct on my private email. (cacreditunion@gmail.com)
 
Yours Truly,
Dr. Francis Nakano
California Credit Union
———————————————————————-
NOTE: If you received this message in your SPAM/BULK folder that is because of the restrictions implemented by your Internet Service Provider,
 

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I don’t want to be forgiven

13 Friday Feb 2015

Posted by dunkablog in Financial Advice

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

@SuzeOrman, debt, forgiveness, student loans, taxes

The President is a good president by my standards. I am happy with many of the social changes that have taken place under his administration. I like that he recognizes poverty as a problem that must be addressed. I like the notion that as we do better, we owe it to our brothers and sisters less fortunate to help. I was once a beneficiary of welfare, both as a child through my mother, and later as an adult, when I was disabled for an extended period of time. I also like that he wants to make higher education available to everyone, just like it was when my folks were growing up in the post-war boom years. And he is right, student loans are crippling the students and preventing them from thriving, especially since the recession and the mass-migration of labor and service jobs offshore.

President Obama designed a student loan “debt forgiveness” program that looks very tempting to a new graduate. What? I can pay less on my loan and when I get to the end of a certain stretch of time (10 years for public servants, 20-30 years for others) then I don’t have to pay it back? Wow! I jumped right on that bandwagon in 2011 when I graduated from USC Marshall School of Business with a staggering amount of debt. I had assumed, as most MBA students would, that I would be earning 2-3 times what I was making at my current job. Right now, I am earning the same amount, and I am at the same job.

Here’s the problem with “forgiveness” – it’s taxable. That’s something that was NOT explained to me when I signed up originally. I got a really great low monthly payback rate, but the interest rate was such that I saw my loan grow from staggering to absurd in the course of one year. In that year, I got married. When I filed taxes the next year, the payback rate was suddenly more than my mortgage. This was because I filed jointly for the first time in my life. Yay! Gay Marriage! Boo! It didn’t help me out financially at all.

So here’s what I think. I see mortgage rates as low as 2.69% right now on the open market. My student loan debt is at 7%, which is slightly higher than some of my credit cards! President Obama, please drop the interest rate on my loan, and I will be happy to pay the whole thing off. My monthly payments would be manageable, and even if they weren’t, I would be able to send enough to keep the principal from growing.

Forgiveness is a virtue, like charity, faith, hope and love. Taxing forgiveness is a cardinal sin.

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Combating Usury

05 Saturday Oct 2013

Posted by dunkablog in Business, Financial Advice

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

banks, integrity, interest, late fees, Usury

I know this will make me appear to some as a cranky old man.  They are not far off, but I prefer to re-frame it as “an older gentleman who has a strong sense of ethics and integrity, willing to persist.”

Last month I paid off a card on which I had carried a balance, but because I couldn’t remember exactly how much I owed, I paid something close to the full amount, and when my statement came, I added the additional 23 some odd dollars as a second payment and that seemed like a final payment to me.

But this morning, THIS came in the mail…

dollarfifteen

20 days to pay? Really?

I stood in my kitchen, with a rising sense of irritation, staring at the crappy little bill. How much did it cost this megabank to send this bill?  It was an effective interest rate on 23.00 of nearly 40%.  They listed some other amount on the side as the amount subject to interest, that was never an actual balance on my account.

Wise men know that time is our most precious resource, and I was about to squander it, but I felt a moral sense of outrage that they had bothered to bill me at all.  They also gave me a compressed timeline (20 days) in which to pay or else be subject to a 35.00 late payment fee and a ding on my credit report.

I called the number on the bill, and waded through an interminable maze of choices until I reached Michael, a megabank rep, with whom I wanted to discuss the charge.  The reason I wanted to speak to a human being was twofold: first, he could explain where the mysterious sum came from that they had used to calculate interest.  Second, it would cost the megabank even more money to have a human being interact with me.  They had clearly prepared for such eventualities and moved their call center overseas, but nonetheless, I wanted them to pay significantly more than $1.15 before I settled the matter.

Michael was sweet, with a southern Indian accent, and he carefully walked me through the logic as to why I was charged the interest.  Apparently, the delay of my instant electronic payment counted as one day in the new payment period at the highest balance.  Dividing this by 31, and counting four more days of 23.00, they arrived at the tidy sum of $1.15.  Because the payoff amount was below the 15.00 minimum, they were permitted to reduce my payment time to 20 days rather than the usual 25.

I expressed irritation with the bank, and made sure to let Michael know that it was not directed at him, but at the usurious practices of the bank itself.  I kept most of the irritation to myself, in fact, saving it up for this story.  Then I asked Michael to waive the charge.

Although through some insane mysterious loophole of banking laws they were technically correct to be charging me this tiny amount of interest, I felt justified in asking for the forgiven final amount as compensation for the time it had wasted.

Michael had a supervisor standing over his shoulder, and I actually heard him say to Michael “put him on hold, put him on hold.” Michael politely put me on hold for about five minutes.  I decided to multi-task and put the dog in her harness and take her on a walk.

During my morning pooch stroll, Michael came back on the line and said that the charge was being reversed, and I would see a credit in the next three business days.  Because that comes dangerously close to my payment deadline, I am going to be checking every weekday to see if this was a trick to hit me up for $35.00 in late payment fees.

Then Michael asked me if I wanted to transfer up to 10,000.00 to the card at 0% interest until January 2015.  After January, the interest would be 9.99%.  What he did not mention is that if there is a remaining balance on January 31 of 2015, the bank is permitted to charge me “back interest” on the outstanding amount and compound it into my new balance.

Patsy chose that moment to express what I was thinking, and I dug for a plastic bag to clean up after her.

It gave me great pleasure to say to Michael “I’m sorry, I don’t have any outstanding balances to transfer at this time.”  This is true, by the way, and I strongly recommend that anyone reading this strive to free yourself from the yoke of megabank slavery.  And be sure to waste their time at every opportunity.

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dunkablog

dunkablog

Writer, filmmaker, doodler, musician, data miner

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